Rachel Jenae

Another Game Changer

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Most days, if I’m honest, I think I have something to offer.  I think I have something to give to the world and I am needed. And if I’m being really honest, I like that feeling.  I’ve never seen anything wrong with having that feeling.  I love to work and I love to work hard.  It’s the Achiever in me.  I feel fulfilled and accomplished after getting things done.  The Learner in me feels accomplished after learning something new.  I don’t know why I’m that way except that that’s just the way I’m wired and created.  Well, that’s not completely true, it’s also our world.  It’s the way things work here on earth.  We produce, we achieve, we excel and we are rewarded.  Who doesn’t want to be rewarded?  The pat on the back and the promotion comes from what you can produce and provide for someone. Even in our churches. You play, sing, speak well and you’re promoted. Even our motives in serving the Lord can be rooted in the fact that one day we’ll receive a reward. So our thinking shifts to adjust to that standard.  We quickly become what we can do and offer someone instead of who we are. It’s another mess to the puzzle.

I’ve never questioned these strengths in my life until recently.  Until I realized how much I was willing to do for God and how little I was willing to receive from Him.  He said it best one day while I’m sure I was getting much accomplished in my day, “Jenae, you can do all of that and work hard for it all so you can feel accomplished about yourself, or you can stop and just receive it from Me, of which much more can be accomplished.”  As always He spoke it with such gentle conviction.  He would not force me to do things His way, but was simply letting me know He had a better way if I was willing to receive it.

Several weeks of these same kind of statements pierced my heart in a new way, reminding me God doesn’t need my help or need me to do anything, He simply wants me.  Isn’t that the message of the cross.  We haven’t done anything to receive it, but yet we get to do just that.  What if our entire lives are still based on that simply “theology” of receiving.  What if He’s still just trying to give to us what is fully ours through the cross, but our minds and tangible thinking keep us from being able to understand how to receive?

As I sat discussing this with my mentor I realized how completely and totally opposite this thinking is of the world we live in.  Stopping is wrong.  Sitting is wrong. Receiving is wrong.  We are told to GO GO GO!, DO DO DO!, and GIVE GIVE GIVE!  Which I might add, are not bad things at all, but the motives behind the going, doing and giving are the key.  Sometimes we’re all too willing to go, do and give simply because we feel good about ourselves and we feel better about how others see us, but if asked to stop all of that, sit down and simply receive… there would only be a few in the room.

Receiving is something we do, but it’s also not.  It’s learned differently.  I’m not sure I can even explain it. Receiving is like being romanced.  It’s allowing someone else to do what you could do for yourself, but receiving five times the results.  It’s being patient and waiting and knowing its worth the wait. It’s letting someone give to you and simply saying “thank you”. Not questioning their motives, but simply receiving, as if they were just used as the delivery person straight from God to you.  It’s stopping and not trying to do anything, but resting simply in being you and being completely content, confident and at peace with that and nothing else.  I’m not sure that even makes sense, but it’s what receiving has looked like to me over the last few months.

It’s learned so differently that my mind has had a hard time wrapping around the idea. But God’s a pretty good teacher and He just keeps giving me example after example because He knows how I need to learn and how I need to be shown.  He knows this is something I can’t miss learning.  It’s another game changer.